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on 2011-06-10 @ 3:42 p.m.

Dear Scott,

Happy birthday! The age gap is back down to two. :)

Scott, you cannot begin to imagine how much your presence fills me. I think if I could live this past year over and over and over again with you I would do it because that's how incredible and amazing it was and you are.

From you sharing probably more than you wanted at dinner in Willard last October to these past few days, we've been on a wild ride together haven't we?

Thank you for being steadfast, encouraging, reliable, hilarrrrious, willing, able, generous, attentive, and so kind to me.

Thank you for being everyone's dad, a dumb, the court jester, man of my dreams.

You are so smart and so full of passion and ability--if anyone can make it in this world, it's you. So stop doubting yourself and just go for it, ya know? I'll always be here for you, lurking like a little possum in the shadows.

There are so many things I wanted to tell you before I began this, but now I just can't put anything into words. If I were to say I'm completely okay right now it would be a lie because my whole body hurts from how much I miss you. I'm crazy about you, so lost without you. But what you said yesterday was right. What everyone else has is unfair. What we have is brilliant, shining, undeniable-- we're fair.

This has been the most vomit-inducing thing I've ever written but also the truest. I love you, Scott.

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